Sunday, December 29, 2013

A Little Situation

Before Bugs made me a mama, I would see newborns snuggled up with their mom or dad and I'd run up and politely ask to take a peek.  I'd get that "what a sweet baby!" giggle and I'd say something that I thought was appropriate-- something like, "oh my goodness! She (or he) is sooooo tiny!!"

I told you that to tell you this:  Before I began touring the country and performing with my husband, I worked for nearly 6 years at a children's gym.  So, when Bugs was born, I anxiously anticipated her 4 month mark so that I could begin taking her to classes there.  And it was fun!  She loved it and I loved it.  

Until we were getting our shoes on to leave.

It started with that comment that I once deemed totally appropriate and harmless.  The exchange went as follows:
Mom 1:  Oh, she is soooo old is she?
Me: 4 months yesterday.
Mom 1:, my friends 1 month old is bigger than her.
Me: *blank stare of confusion*
Mom 2: How much did she weigh when she was born? Was she a preemie?
Me: She was only 5 days early.  She weighed 7 pounds, 2 oz.
Mom 2: Oh, so she was average sized then.
Me: Yeah, I guess....she's my first.
Mom 1 to Mom 2: She's definitely not on the charts.  
Mom 2: *shakes head*
Me: But...but....she's hitting all her milestones.
Mom 3: What does her pediatrician say? Is he worried?
Me: He hasn't said anything.  Her weight is lower than a lot of babies her age, but that can be normal in breastfed babies.  Sometimes they have slower weight gain, sometimes quicker.  I think every baby is different.  And I heard there is a chart for exclusively breastfed babies that's a bit different.
Mom 3: Oh, is she ONLY breastfed.???

Say what?!?!  Yeah Bugs, my feelings exactly.

So, I packed up the Bug and headed home and directly to my computer where I proceeded to Google the bejeezus out of every growth chart,  every breast feeding website and Facebook page and every blog where a mother had a "tiny" baby. 

But, trust me when I tell you that if a baby is small, the mama knows this.  I knew it.  Bugs' pediatrician knew it.  It was never a cause for concern since she was healthy, hitting all her developmental milestones (sometimes earlier that average) and was an all around happy baby.  But, the onslaught of the Mommies 1, 2 & 3 made me doubt what I already knew to be true--she was getting everything she needed from "only" breastfeeding.

But I did learn an important lesson--much like dealing with pregnant women, the only truly appropriate thing to say is how wonderful they are!  Every pregnant woman needs to hear that they're beautiful and every new mom should get to hear how adorable her baby is and what a blessing she holds in her matter how light or heavy.

What is your favorite comment that you have received about your baby?

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